"The Beach"

Remember that Leonardo DiCaprio flick from a few years back called "The Beach" ? Well, I'm at the island where he was based out of during the filming of the movie -- Phuket, Thailand. For those of you who don't know, Phuket is Thailand's largest island and is a world-famous vacation hotspot and not-to-be-missed tourist destination.

Boy, can I see why! Patong Beach is just one of the many beaches that this island in the south of Thailand features. It’s touristy like you wouldn’t believe! Take a scene out of Disneyland and you’ll begin to get a sense of how many people are running around. Patong’s vicinity is abuzz with activity at all hours of the day and night – so it’s more like an adult Disneyland. Some of the other, quieter beaches are more suitable for families with small children. I hate to admit this, but it’s easy to get caught up in the excitement in the air. Everyone is there to have fun (except the locals, of course, who are working their butts off to sell, sell, sell to the hungry tourists). You can find everything from postcards, cheap sandals, scandalous swimwear, antique replicas and other traditional décor to 24 hours convenience stores, an array of ATM machines, Starbucks’s and even company for the night, whatever your taste!

My clique is staying at the Hilton Arcadia Phuket. It is an absolutely fabulous hotel with excellent service and three different outdoor swimming pools, an onsite spa, fitness center, several dining establishments and even a mini golf course. Most in the group are Thai, so they’re quite comfortable with navigating the island, but somebody who can speak English is always close by – it seems to be the universal language in Thailand, because even the tourists from Europe and other parts of Asia use it to communicate with the locals.

Anyway, having been to Phuket a few times, they know the drill. I find out they’ve hired a driver for the weekend that picked us up from the international airport and drops us off at the hotel. We unpack and met up again to go for lunch. We sail right on by Patong, much to my chagrin. I wasn’t about to pipe up though, since I was the one tagging along on this trip. Apparently, they had been planning this for some time. We make our way along the main highway on the island and spiral along the windy road up to a high point. I see signs for many other touristy destinations such as FantaSea (a recreation of a traditional Thai village for the purpose of entertaining tourists), Simon Cabaret (featuring multi-talented lady-boys), a couple of Muslim graveyards (we are in the south of Thailand, after all) and a bunch of other beaches. We finally stop at a place called Laem Sing (Lam Sing, Lion’s Point, I think, so named because it has a small and rocky promontory that sticks out into the Andaman Sea) – Sing, as in Singha beer! It’s a nice, quiet and somewhat remote beach featuring it’s own rows of beach umbrellas and recliners. We sit down for lunch, which was an experience in itself.

I’ve always known that Thais love food, but I witnessed it first hand, since this is really my first meal with a bunch of them. There are only 6 of us, but they order something like 10 different plates of food, plus rice, soup and fruit plates! Not to mention drinks and appetizers! Somehow, we managed to eat it all, but not before I committed a cultural faux pas ~

One of the dishes we ordered was a whole fried fish in garlic and whatever else. Once we had finished picking at it from one side, I proceeded to…turn it over, so I can get at the other side – mostly since I didn’t get much of the first side as I was waiting to observe how my Thai friends do it. Anyway, they all let out a gasp! What? What did I do?? You’re not supposed to do that! Do what? Flip the fish! It’s bad luck! Uh oh, I thought. Why? It has to do with the fishermen. Oh, does flipping it mean that they’ll have bad luck with their catch? No, flipping the fish is symbolic of flipping the boat! Oh! Sorry, I’ll flip it back. No! Don’t do that. Ok, well, how are we supposed to eat the other side of the fish? Oh, that’s easy. You can either scoop it from underneath or you can remove the bones and eat it after that. Can you show me? Sure.

Anyway, I was mortified. Here I was, being the ignorant American that just upset the whole table. My friend from Seattle piped up and said he didn’t know about it either. So it took a little bit of pressure from me. Still, I felt like quite embarrassed by the whole ordeal.

After we let our food settle, we all got Thai massages on the beach from the ladies working at the beachfront food stand (that was their other income producing activity). It only cost 300 baht for an hour – about $8.50. Score! It was exactly what I needed after having an achy body for the last week and a half from traveling and trying to adjust to a new bed and pillow. Then I went for a short swim ~ I’m at the beach! What else would I do?