Reflections on being an Asian-American in Thailand During A Visit to Ubon Ratchathani University

I wrote this article for the Fulbright Thailand newsletter a little while back. Mostly, it is a publication intended for circulation among the Fulbright network here -- current and past Fulbrighters, member of the Board, etc. It's a little cheeky, but I'm just doing my darndest to be the perfect little angel ~~ Hah hah =). Just kidding Phi Tip (aka Executive Director of Fulbright Thailand)!!!!


***** ***** ***** ***** ***** *****

On a recent trip to Ubon Ratchathani University, I was asked to reflect on a number of issues that I would share with audiences of educators and students. Among many other questions thrown my way, I was asked to address the following questions in particular: What inspired me to come to Thailand? How does it feel to look Thai but be American? What do I hope to achieve in my time here? In beginning my discussion of these topics, perhaps it will be helpful to answer the first question that I am asked after people learn that I am not Thai – where are you from?

My parents and I are immigrants from Southeast Asia. Although my ethnic background is Tae-Chiew Chinese, all of us were born in Cambodia and fled the country in 1983 to escape the tyrannical Khmer Rouge. We were political refugees who found safety first in the refugee camp at Khao I Dang, in Sakeo Province here in Thailand and then in the Philippines. Finally, in May of 1985, we settled in Los Angeles, California in the United States. What makes it complicated when people ask me the question, “where are you from?” is that I don’t always know how long of an answer they are interested in hearing. Do I say America? If I do, the next comment will invariably be, “but you look Asian.” So do I say Chinese? Or should I say Cambodian? Eventually, I come up with something like this – I’m Chinese, but I was born in Cambodia and now I live in America. It’s enough to confuse many people.

So what inspired me to come to Thailand, you ask. The simple answer is that I wanted to reconnect with my roots. But what does that really mean? Since I grew up in a household with a mix of cultures and languages – Chinese, English and Khmer, I always had a hard time with forming an identity for myself. Earlier I touched upon whether I should say that I’m American, Chinese or Khmer. In the end, I acknowledged that I felt a certain draw towards Southeast Asia when I had to pick first the region and then the country that I would go to for my Fulbright grant. Why not China or Cambodia? Truthfully, my Chinese isn’t good enough to operate in China and Cambodia’s Fulbright program is still very much in its formative stages. In contrast, Thailand does not have a language requirement and the well-established Fulbright program here has been in existence for over 50 years now. Also, my topic is in business and economics and Thailand provides a much more interesting case study than would Cambodia as the former’s economy has experienced a lot more growth and has taken advantage of its potential in a much more effective way than the latter. Besides, Thailand’s culture and society shares a lot of common threads with Cambodia and the majority of the large Chinese population in Thailand is Tae-Chiew, the same ethnic group as my family. For these reasons, I felt like Thailand was the right choice for me.

With regards to looking Thai but thinking and operating as American in Thailand – well, it has its ups and downs. For example, I don’t get honked at by the tuk-tuk drivers as I’m walking down the street. The street vendors aren’t always aggressively trying to sell me their wares and trinkets. I don’t get the same types of solicitations from the Thai women who work in the various bars whenever I walk down Sukhumvit Road. On the flip side, most Thais begin their interaction with me in Thai. These days, I do fine with it because I have managed to learn enough Thai to know what they are asking me and to be able to answer them. However, when I first arrived in Bangkok, it was routine for me to feel quite foolish and helpless. I would sheepishly admit that I don’t speak any Thai and felt quite embarrassed about it. Still, all was not lost as my parents did a good job of instilling some important Asian values in me. Respect for elders and for religion, proper social conduct and the ability to be aware of and show sensitivity to different cultural practices. Strangely, I feel very much at home in Thailand now. The values, customs and cultural sensitivities seem like they have always been there. Coming here just awakened them from deep within me. In the end, I do have to add that daily, I encounter things that confuse me and amaze me. To conclude, however, I should say that there are things that Americans and Thais may learn from each other. Perhaps Americans should be more jai yen. Maybe Thais can learn to check their email more frequently and reply in a timely manner.

Before I left Seattle and came to Bangkok, I had dinner with a few of my former professors at Seattle University as a sort of farewell and congratulations. One of them asked me, what are you expecting to learn from your time in Thailand and what criteria will you use to determine whether or not it will be a success? At the time, I told him that my trip to Thailand will be my first time out of the country on me own and that I don’t really know what to expect. I told him that I just hope to learn as much as I can and let things run their course. To some extent, my answer has remained unchanged. I am doing all I can to be open to new experiences. I’m eating as much food as I can and going on as many weekend excursions as I can. I’m also telling “my story” as to why I’m in Thailand to as many people as will listen. From this, I have been able to meet and get introductions (or at least contact information) from many people who will perhaps play a role in helping me to learn and accomplish more of what I came here to do. I am doing my best to learn the language here because I don’t think you can fully grasp a culture and people if you cannot speak their language. Fortunately for me, I have found Thai to be more than manageable as it shares many words in common with Khmer and grammar is very similar for the two languages, although they come from different families.

Speaking of languages, one of the things that the student audience found quite amusing was the fact that I could entertain them by speaking short phrases in Thai, Mandarin Chinese, Khmer and an entire presentation in perfect English. I did my best to encourage them to go out and explore the world and let them know that although it can be challenging, it also comes with rewards. I encouraged them to study hard and not to be afraid to ask questions and engage their professors in conversation, for which I received applauses and praise from the educators in the audience.

In closing, I just have to say that in my short four months here, I had learned much more than I was able to appreciate as I went. It is only in reflecting back and the “looking into the mirror” effect that comes from being in a culture and society that is different from my own that I have come to appreciate our differences and mentally document my learning and growth. Much thanks to Fulbright and the wonderful staff at TUSEF for giving me this life-changing experience!

***** ***** ***** ***** ***** *****

You can also follow this link to read the short article I wrote for the website. You will find pictures there and a little bit more of a description of what went down:

http://www.fulbrightthai.org/knowledge/read.asp?id=215&type=news

What you won't get the inside scoop on from either article is this one funny thing that happened after the presentations were concluded. So I don't think I mentioned that all of the students in the audience are college freshmen (a large percentage of whom are female). When I stepped down from the speaker table and microphones, a bunch of them came up to me and asked to take pictures with me using their mobile phones. One of them asked me for my email, whereupon I produced my card. All of a sudden, I found myself handing out all the cards I normally carry around to give to people I may run into who might be able to help with my research. One of the girls even asked me to sign my card for her!! Later, I got an email from one of the female teachers saying thanks for stopping by and sharing my thoughts. She also told me that she spotted me as wallpaper on one of her student's computers. Isn't that crazy? That was my brush with celebrity-hood. It felt a little strange...heh heh. The most important thing that came out of my trip was that I got the contact information for one of the premier scholars in Thailand on it's very special brand of economic theory -- Sufficiency Economics! YES!!

Dream World: The Magical Kingdom

The awesome foursome (that would be me, Mai, Sacha and Jeremy) along with another Thai friend of Mai and Sacha, Tra took a day trip to Dream World in nearby Pathumthani province. It’s like a mini Disneyland, Universal Studios, Six Flags, Knott’s Berry Farm and Raging Waters all rolled into one. This description is coming from somebody who used to live in Los Angeles, where most of these places are located =)…sorry if you’re not quite getting what I’m describing because you’ve never been. Anyway, it was quite a fun-filled and wet day because Jeremy, Sacha and I thought it would be a good idea to ride some of the water rides. The three of us made fun of Tra, who decided she would get one of the ponchos available for purchase. I mean, who wears ponchos on a water ride, right? Apparently, all the Thais do. Hah hah. Mai, who knew better, decided she would just sit out =). And so Jeremy, Sacha and I walked around for much of the rest of the day in moist undies.

Chiang Mai: The Jewel of the North and The Royal Flora Ratchapruek

So my friend Arion flew in from Taipei to meet me for a short trip up to Chiang Mai, Thailand’s “Jewel of the North.” Arion is actually a friend from Seattle who is studying Mandarin at the National Taiwan Normal University. I had originally wanted to include a short trip to see one of the Fulbright English Teaching Assistants up there, but once I figured things out, we would have been hard-pressed time-wise to make it happen. Especially since our other goal was to go see the Royal Flora Ratchapruek – a horticultural expo – I say horticultural because it was more than just flowers and plants, as the official name suggests – in honor of HM the king’s 60th anniversary on the throne. Well, technically, the word flora refers to the plant life of an area in general, but the gardens, many of which were adorned with plastic, wood, metal, stone, fountains and even televisions, deserve more than “flower show.”

We jumped into a taxi right outside Bumrungrad International hospital, which is right next-door to my building. If you listen to NPR a lot, you’ve probably heard of my famous neighbor, renowned for its promotion of medical tourism. Anyway, as soon as we had loaded our stuff into the taxi and got in, the taxi driver turns around and tells us that it will be 300 baht to the airport, not including tolls. It’s normally 185 plus 65 in express-way tolls. Freaking A**. This ONLY happens when I’m with white people. Hah hah. Sorry, there’s no other way to say it. So I tell the taxi driver no and insist that he use the meter (in Thai) like he’s supposed to. He gives me some sort of lame excuse that there’s no service there at this time. I later figured out that he meant he wasn’t going to get a fare coming back at that hour (it was probably a little after 11am). After a bit of struggling back and forth, Arion butts in and says, “let’s just do it.” Despite my irritation with the whole situation, I gave in. I mean, our luggage was in the trunk and we were already moving along. I wouldn’t want to have to deal with a disgruntled taxi driver driving off with our stuff…anyway, we’re talking a difference of like $3 US. Still, it irritates me sometimes that there’s a Thai price and a foreigner price…ra-kha Thai and ra-kha farang – one can’t help but feel ripped off.

So we get to the airport way ahead of time; mostly because our flight was delayed for almost an hour. Arion had never been to Suvarnabhumi (pronounced Suwannapoom, I know, weird) prior to a few nights earlier, when he came in from Taipei, so we took some time to explore the world’s largest, newest and most dysfunctional airport – dubbed “Corruption International” by the Thais. If you want to read more about it, go to my friend Jeremy’s blog – jeremyinc.blogspot.com. Arion started right away with what would end up being the first of a collection of hundreds of photographs of all sorts of random things from the weekend.

As soon as we got off the plane in Chiang Mai and claimed our luggage, we were herded towards a tour desk and talked into getting a tour package to the famous Doi Suthep temple. All we originally wanted was some help with a hotel for the couple of nights we’d be there since our attempts at searching beforehand were foiled by the fact that the flora expo was in its last couple of weeks, so accommodations were tight. Anyway, after a little bit of bargaining, we got him to include transfer service to the hotel and drop-off at the Royal Flora Expo the next morning.



This collection of photos is from the famous Doi Suthep temple. The word "doi" means mountain in the Northern Thai dialect. Not sure what the "su" part of "Suthep" means, but "thep" means heavenly or holy. It is so named because it sits on the mountain named Doi Suthep. The full name of the temple is Wat Phrathat Doi Suthep.









Speaking of the expo – it was lovely. Still, it’s nothing I can say too much about. It was just a big park with a whole bunch of exhibitions from various countries from around the world. I don’t remember seeing one from the US, although I did see a very sad one from Cambodia…




This is me flossing my threads ...er clogs at the Netherlands exhibit.


This was just one of the millions of orchids that were featured in the gigantic orchid garden. Apparently, they grow as easily here as cosmos grow in the Pacific Northwest -- well, except that they live longer. I know there are some of you out there who are like, if only I can get my orchids to flower a second time...heh heh.


This pumpkin has been carved with the royal insignia.


This picture was shot in the garden submitted by Bhutan


This series of photos feature the royal temple, the gardens surrounding it and of course, moi ~ By the way...does the lion make me look tan?






These two photos are from the Lanna exhibit. Lanna was the ancient Thai kingdom to the north. It's center was in present day Chiang Mai. It is known for its very distinct architecture and art (painting, wood carving, scuplture). Sometimes, as a tourist, you can choose to stay in hotel rooms decorated in the "Lanna Style."



This particular exhibit is the famous teak house that Laos gifted to Thailand to commemorate HM the king's 60th anniversary on the throne. They have a very strange relationship, Thailand and Laos. Thailand calls Laos it's "Little Brother." The culture and language between the two countries is very similar, but for some reason, Laos has failed to develop at the same pace and with the same success as Thailand has.


All in all, I think Arion and I both found Chiang Mai to be a rather enjoyable city. The weather was unlike Bangkok. For the first time since coming to Thailand, I didn’t feel enveloped in what is at times suffocating heat and congestion. I’ve since gotten used to Bangkok’s warm and humid climate that is a result of its location in the Chao Phraya River delta, but it was really quite nice to see mountains and green trees again. Chiang Mai is a big city (it is Thailand’s second largest and has a population of over one million) with a small town feel.


And it even has its own Starbucks! Actually, the ONLY TWO reasons I go is because it seems to be the only place that offers soymilk. Being lactose intolerant in Thailand is usually ok because dairy is not widely used in Thai cuisine. However, they give me a confused look when I ask for it anywhere else. The other reason I go is because Starbucks is the only place that actually serves BREWED coffee. If I ask for hot coffee anywhere else, it's usually a gross liquid concoction resembling and Americano.


In Chiang Mai, I can get my Starbucks fix and then walk down a side street and buy these guys: (1) mangosteens (2) rambutans (3) fruits galore...

Phra Nakhon si Ayutthaya: The Sacred City of Ayodhya

Ayutthaya is a Thai adaptation of the Sanskrit word “Ayodhya” meaning “not to be warred with.” Ayodhya is actually the name of an ancient city in India believed to be the birthplace of Rama, the seventh incarnation of the Hindu god Vishnu. This is just one example of the powerful influence of ancient India on the people of Southeast Asia. Ayutthaya was founded as the capital of a Thai king by the name of U-Thong (Ramathibodi I) in 1350. In 1365, he forced the king of Sukhothai to submit to him and made Sukhothai a vassal state. Then, in 1438, Sukhothai was made into one of Ayutthaya’s provinces. Thus, Ayutthaya became the new center of military, political, cultural and socio-economic power and eventually, the capital of the kingdom that was to become Siam (before the kingdom’s name was changed to Thailand in the 20th century).

My trip to Ayutthaya came about in a fairly interesting way. I went with a young Thai lady by the name of Mai, whom I had just met a few days earlier on my trip to Koh Kred. Originally, we had planned the trip to include my Canadian friends Sacha and Jeremy through whom I had met Mai, but Sacha ended up having to work unexpectedly and Jeremy had some sort of headache the morning of. I wondered if we would still be going, just Mai and me. It was particularly awkward because young Thai women (the “proper” ones) don’t normally hang out alone with men, unless they’re dating and even then, she is often accompanied by an older sister or female friend. Also, it’s just weird to hang out with a relative stranger for a whole day. I started to get worried that we weren’t going to go as I was really looking forward to it. I was relieved to find out that Mai was where she said she would be at the appointed hour and that she had invited another female friend to go along with us. Her name is Rini and she is an English teacher from Malaysia.

So the three of us met up at a place called Victory Monument, a common meeting place for buses and mini-vans for hire to various places in Thailand. It was also one of the places that was bombed during the New Year's Eve attacks -- don't worry, it's USUALLY quite safe. Two of the reasons I was looking forward to traveling with Mai, aside from the fact that she is a total sweetheart, is that one, she speaks Thai and knows what she is doing or at least, she can ask questions better than I can in my broken Thai; and two, she’s from Surin, a province that borders Cambodia and so she can also speak Khmer (Cambodian). We had lots of fun when we first met just learning languages because the two of us conversed in Thai, Khmer and English. She taught me some Thai whilst I taught her Khmer and English.


When we arrived in Ayutthaya, we met up with one of Mai’s friends, Gook. Gook was a blast and completely atypical of any Thai woman I’ve ever met. Actually, she has the personality of a western woman. She’s independent, extroverted, free-spirited, speaks her mind and doesn’t conform to any such notion of a “proper” lady. She jumped on the tour bandwagon with Mai, Rini and I and the four of us went about exploring Ayutthaya in a tuk-tuk we had rented for the day.









This is a very famous "postcard" site. It is located at Wat Mahathat.


Apparently, Gook has never actually taken a tour of the historical sites in Ayutthaya, even though she lives there. We finished off the day in a boat tour around the island part of the city, which is fairly large.


These are shots I took of the people who live along the river...going about their daily lives, particularly when tourists are around.



This is me pretending that I'm a traditional Thai dancer.



Ok, so one of the temples we visited featured this glass case displaying a life-sized image of a famous Buddhist monk. A little freaky, if you ask me...


These are pictures of I took of a Chinese temple along our river tour.




See what I mean about a gal who is untraditional? I mean, what kind of a Buddhist would put merit-making gold leaf on herself instead of on the Buddha figures? Ah Gook...


These grounded boats used to be part of a floating resort. They're still part of a resort now, just on land.


These are pictures of my elephant riding adventure. My companion is Mai.




We made a few stops along the way to visit some of the more prominent temples and then headed back to the restaurant that her boyfriend owns. There, we were treated to drinks and a fabulous dinner.